dirty sanchez

Kofi sent out an email today. it was hilarious. here is some of it:

quote

After coming back from mass at St. Paul's Cathedral on Christmas Eve, I was nervously flipping channels while waiting for kick-off of the Vikes-Pack game when I noticed something on the TV guide on MTV titled "Dirty Sanchez"... you gotta watch anything with a title like that. So I flipped to it and was shortly thereafter rewarded with the most disgusting thing I've ever seen on TV. Turns out this was a warped British variation of "Jackass", and here's the stunt I happened to catch:

They put a beer bong up a guy's ass, filled his ass with beer while holding him upside down, took out the bong, shook him around for a few minutes (while still upside-down), and then flipped him over, at which point the beer - now murky & brown - started coming out of his anus... one guy caught a fair quantity of this "newly brewed stout" (that's what they called it!) in a bowl, and the three of them passed it around and drank it!

Anyway, at this point, I went into a mini-seizure and began to realize that this was an experience I would never recover from... of course the Vikes soon lost afterwards, putting me into a state of catatonic shock for Christmas Even and most of Christmas day... not a bright start to the season of good cheer!

end quote

However, the new year was off to an auspicious start when Kofi won $1700 in his NFL pool.

In other news, I saw that the tsunami was so powerful that it swept around the world over the next 36 hours, with its last residual waves perceptibly jostling tide gauges from Russia's remote northeastern Pacific waters to the North Atlantic.

incidentally, my child was asking me some questions about the tsunami the other night.

dad, why did god let the tsunami happen.

child, everything happens for a reason.

dad, for what reason did the tsunami happen.

child, it's not because god is angry at the democratic muslim nation of indonesia.

no, i wouldn't think so dad. but why didn't god stop the tsunami. does god not care enough to intervene.

egad child, what are you, a deist. we are all sinners. besides, it's all part of god's plan. all is for the best in this, the best of all possible worlds.

whatever pangloss.

what. who. go to your room child.