service

from the onion

millions of american lips called to service in fight against poverty

In response to the record number of American poor, Secretary of the Treasury John Snow called millions of American lips to service Monday. "Poverty is a menace to society," Snow said. "As the ranks of the nation's poor grow and more social programs are scaled back, it is crucial that all able Americans talk about how something must be done." Snow then entreated all able-voiced men and women between the ages of 18 and 24 to volunteer to periodically mention that the current poverty rate of 12.5 percent is too high.

1. trade balance, deficit, national debt

the u.s. imports more than it exports. but negative trade balances are not necessarily terrible news. in particular, an effect known as reserve currency status makes it possible for dominant currencies to run significant trade deficits with limited economic impact. because the united states dollar is generally regarded to be extremely stable, dollars which are exported are held by persons overseas and there is no pressure to return them to the united states. furthermore, countries running large trade surpluses (e.g. china and japan) use these funds to purchase us treasury notes (which fund our budget deficit), essentially allowing the united states to export pieces of paper and get real goods and services in return. the pricing of oil in us dollars also forces nations and institution to hold some of their reserves in us dollars in order to hedge against the rapid rises and falls in prices of this all-essential energy source. if, as some economists are speculating, current weakness in the dollar were to cause the shift of foreign exchange reserves or oil pricing into another currency such as the euro, then the reserve currency advantage would also switch to the european union.
the asian times always has a less than sanguine forecast for the u.s. economy. here's an interesting article i read last year. asia fills her boots: dollar reserves skyrocket. if you are going to read something i link to, you should read about the balance of trade in the hitchhiker's guide to understanding exchange rates.

2. bush misled us on iraq war.

the intelligence misled bush. was bush honest about his reasons. in my opinion, no. bush was searching for and shifting reasons on the hunt for justification. was it WMDs. was it freedom for iraqis, democracy in the middle east. was it oil. was it al-qaeda. was it power. naturally, i’m sure the old answer is all of the above.

3. iraq is a quadmire.

again, bad intelligence. okay, a dash of hubris and pinch of cultural ignorance too.

4. scare tactics. safer under bush.

this is something that nobody seems to talk about. how difficult was it to be president after september 11th. the answer is, not difficult. how difficult is it to be president, seriously. i don’t feel like writing more about that now.

5. environment.

true.

6. death penalty, abortion, stem cell research, gay marriage, religion, etc.

the u.s. executes more juveniles than the rest of the world combined. i don’t have a good argument for abortion, but on a personal level i reserve the right to kill people whenever i fell justified. i kid. we all know i’m outraged by discrimination against gays. bush favors an old testament god, not the idol jesus. eye for an eye beeatch. open the earth to swallow people, bring fire down from the sky smite, spread pestilence to kill people, send hurricanes to drown people. there are a couple things i want to mention here. o'reilly is a freak. mary cheney is a lesbian. the o'reailly factor for lesbians. also, here’s an interesting web site about sodom and gomorrah. okay, one more thing. let us recall the seven deadly sins: pride, envy, wrath/anger, sloth, avarice/greed, gluttony, and lust. U-S-A, U-S-A. sins are bullshit. i haven’t sinned in years. but hypocrisy makes me chuckle.

7. assault weapons ban.

true.

you are probably a terrorist

here are some traffic fatality statistics from nhtsa in 2002:

total traffic fatalities: 42,815
alcohol-related fatalities: 17,419 - 41% of total
fatality rate per 100 million vehicle miles traveled (VMT): 1.51
rollover fatalities: 10,666
motorcycle fatalities: 3,244
large truck fatalities: 5,111
child fatalities: 968
pedestrian fatalities: 4,808
2.92 million injuries
highway crashes cost society $230.6 billion a year, about $820 per person.
also, when a big car gets in a fatal accident with a small car, the big car is much more likely to kill people in the small car.

data analysis:
if you increase your statistical odds of causing a traffic fatality, you are a ticking time bomb of a terrorist. that's right, if you speed, talk on your cell phone, drive under the influence, run red lights, etc., then you are a terrorist. when you tell me that you speed because you are a good driver and it is appropriate under the conditions, all i hear is an ideology of hate. i hear you say that you hate my freedom and the laws of the united states of america. you hate my freedom enough to kill me with your automobile.

leading causes of death from the cdc:

Heart Disease: 696,947
Cancer: 557,271
Stroke: 162,672
Chronic lower respiratory diseases: 124,816
Accidents (unintentional injuries): 106,742
Diabetes: 73,249
Influenza/Pneumonia: 65,681
Alzheimer's disease: 58,866
Nephritis, nephrotic syndrome, and nephrosis: 40,974
Septicemia: 33,865

data analysis:
the number of deaths in iraq isn't a big deal. think about how many people will die because of the inadequate supply of influenza vaccinations. think about the number of people who die smoking-related deaths. the september 11th world trade center casualties are not a big deal.

i'm not the first one making the statement about iraq casualties not being a big deal.

dole

there was an article in the star tribune yesterday about the widening wealth gap between white families and minorities. you can read the press release or the entire report from the pew hispanic center. net worth accounts for the value of items such as a home, car, checking and savings accounts, and stocks, minus debts such as mortgage, car loans, and credit card bills. minority homeownership is low, and homeownership is a great way to build wealth.

here's a little colon delimited table about net worth.

category: 1996: 2002: % change
hispanic: $6,961: $7,932: 14.0%
black: 7,135: 5,988: -16.1
white: 75,482: 88,651: 17.4
all households: 53,160: 59,706: 12.3

there was also an article in the star tribune about a debate raging over need-based financial aid at macalester. macalester may soon move away from a need-based financial aid system. macalester admits students based on criteria other than ability to pay and then pledges to meet full financial needs of students if they enroll. macalester has been using earnings from its endowment to pay for the enormous cost of financial aid. after the expense of financial aid, mac has little money for other costs: faculty, staff, construction, maintenance, utilities, etc. the argument follows that the quality of education will go down and students will lose interest. opponents of need-based aid also point to macalester's rather lonely status as a provider of need-based financial aid. naturally, idealistic students are pissed. who doesn't think need-based financial aid is great. but the reality is the school has to pay for it, somebody has to pay for it. think of macalester as a business. labor, materials, product, market. labor=faculty. materials=campus/facilities. product=education. market=students. a need-based system reduces the tuition paid per student, thus reducing revenue. so, what compensates for this loss of revenue. you can eat away at the endowment, stimulate increased alumni giving, and/or reduce costs by decreasing spending on faculty, staff, campus facilities, etc. the endowment is like the environment, you don't want to plunder it too much. mac alumni don't give enough money. and if faculty salaries and investment in campus facilities decrease, school quality decreases. are smart kids with money willing to come to a school with mediocre faculty and campus facilities in exchange for associating with the likes of me. ask their parents, they're paying. macalester wants to create a finite budget for financial aid, a budget which would still dole out a nice wad of financial aid.

tuesday's tenet: gay marriage is bad and should be decided by the people, not the courts, because the majority-elected legislatures, not courts, have historically protected the rights of the minorities. let's go for two on this tuesday. gay marriage is bad because is sodomizes the sanctity of heterosexual marriage, thereby jeopardizing heterosexual marriages. i can speak to that. marye and i have often cursed the specter of gay marriage that has left us with a tenuous marriage.

singh owns blums

the venerable dr. simon messing was in town this last weekend for the wedding of a whilom childhood friend of his. ziyad and i had the pleasure of hosting our esteemed comrade. one of the topics discussed over the course of our conversation was the global competitiveness report, which ranks the world's economies. i recommend reading the executive summary if you have time.

1. Finland, 2. USA, 3. Sweden, 4. Taiwan, 5. Denmark, 6. Norway, 7. Singapore, 8. Switzerland, 9. Japan, 10. Iceland, 11. United Kingdom, 12. Netherlands, 13. Germany, 14. Australia, 15. Canada, 16. UAE

it is clear that moral laxity has destroyed nordic economies.

sports

macalester ran at the jim drew's invitational at la crosse. the next race is conference. can mac claim third place.

9. St. Olaf
34 Malcolm Richards, Sr 25:50.5
37 Kelly Fulton, Sr 25:57.7
49 Sam Hauck, Jr 26:10.6
55 Marc Ellingson, Jr 26:26.8
56 Tony Hoff, So 26:30.3
74 Jason Havey, Jr 26:56.9
83 Jesse Horst, Jr 27:10.1
Time = 2:10:55.9 Places = 231

10. Macalester
48 Bo Rydze, Sr 26:08.4
53 Dylan Keith, So 26:20.2
59 Eric Olson, Sr 26:32.8
63 Roscoe Sopiwnik, Jr 26:44.4
88 Nate Crider, Fr 27:18.9
95 Tim Stendahl, Sr 27:27.0
116 Derek Loudermilk, Sr 27:45.5
Time = 2:13:04.7 Places = 311

other notable performances:
237 Paul Singh, Sr 29:12.3
241 Martins Blums, Sr 29:17.1
259 Ben Johnson, Jr 29:39.3

nice race paul.

i had a nice string of runs last week. 12-9-18-12. then i got really tired and unbearably hungry. i thought, why the hell am i running so much. i couldn't come up with a good enough answer. then i saw an article in runner's world that said you can run faster by running only three days a week. perfect, i thought. and that's where it stands.

huskers 59 - baylor 27
vikings 38 - saints 31

and i was guilty of schadenfreude when i saw this score:

gophers 17 - michigan state 51

aaron, i am certainly not deriding you, but i am trying to disappoint your hopes by defying your view of bush.

hey alf, i just read on the ap wire that only two thousand americans are voting on november the second. all other potential voters struck deals with their political foils, agreeing that a trip to the polls was a waste of their ass-fattening time, since their votes would cancel each other out.

klinker, i remember fondly the last time i hunted pheasants. i also recall the time i dropped a fat man on a chump who insulted the huskers.

dewey defeats truman

people who complain about outsourcing remind me of people who complain about losing after they got a head start. outsourcing is good.

in my brief adult life i have yet to be affected by politics. government does not affect me. the only thing that suffers is the nation’s probity, as defined by me. that's why, like jude, i am not going to vote. i already pay monthly fees to the city of minneapolis for water, solid waste disposal, and sewer use. i tread on local streets, arterials, highways, and interstates. i'll pay for that. i currently pay to use public transportation when i bus to work. but if i have to drive, i will. i'll buy a fucking CXT and drive that shit through people’s yards. i live in a safe neighborhood with lower-income families providing a buffer between me and crime. if the government would allow me to buy shoulder-to-air missiles and nuclear weapons, i wouldn't need national defense. i'm never sick. my body can convert light into chemical energy. i don't care who gets elected. unless a communist is elected. look what communism has done to alf. alf’s blog sucks. alf sits in front of his computer for at least an hour every day staring at the screen, searching his memory for a shred of something interesting in his life, only to find that communism has left him with nothing.

in the united states, my blog has developed a huge following. my inchoate political diatribes have generated thousands of succinct hate emails. recently, the tone has changed to praise due largely in part to the poignant commentary of king klinker. in case you haven't been reading the comments, click here for the best of.

rube cred for bush

well, i watched the third and final presidential debate last night. kerry did a good job, while bush demonstrated his lack of rhetorical skill and inability to fustigate kerry on domestic issues.

bush did tell a funny joke during the debate.

"hey ben, pete and repeat were on a boat. pete fell off and who was left."
repeat.
"pete and repeat were on a boat..."

it would be easy to create a political platform to present to the american people. it would be easy to surround yourself with a competent staff. however, creating a tangible platform is beyond my abilities. at my core i am probably a centrist most closely aligned with the dnc. i am not a libertarian because libertarians apparently refuse to admit that people are irresponsible, and that leads to naive policy.

but anyway, the purpose of this blog is not to present my clarion political platform. i will write whatever i please, whether i believe it or not. i think most people realize that.

parties

the bus was a little early today and i don’t think i have much to say. so here it is dark and early in the morning.

list of political parties in the united states

the big two: republicans and democrats.

biggest third parties in the united states in alphabetical order: constitution party, green party, libertarian party, natural law party, reform party.

then there is the party of bane.

it's good to check out these sites. maybe they will focus your political platform.

sebaceous fat ass

it's time to get away from politics and sports for one day.

the last book i talked about was The Turn of the Screw by henry james. in the meantime i have read four books. i read the acclaimed Daisy Miller by henry james. then i read Main Street by sinclair lewis, Three Came Home by agnes keith, and The Martian Chronicles by ray bradbury. the books were, respectively, bad, good, good, good. maybe i will talk about them another time. right now i want to talk about one of the books i am currently reading, All the King's Men by robert penn warren. there are some hilarious descriptions of the character tiny duffy. here are some excerpts:

Mr. Duffy debouched massively from the Cadillac.

There was Tiny Duffy, who was almost as big back then as he was to get to be. He didn't need any sign to let you know what he was. If the wind was right, you knew he was a city-hall slob long before you could see the whites of his eyes. He had the belly and he sweated through his shirt just above the belt buckle, and he had the face, which was creamed and curded like a cow patty in a spring pasture, only it was the color of biscuit dough, and in the middle was his grin with the gold teeth. He was a Tax Assessor...

It ain't any secret that Tiny Duffy is as sebaceous a fat-ass as ever made the spring groan in a swivel chair.

Duffy's features exhibited the slightest twitch of interest, but the twitch was dissipated into the vast oleaginous blankness which was the face of Duffy in repose.

here's a random sentence that a guy i know liked:

How life is strange and changeful, and the crystal is in the steel at the point of fracture, and the toad bears a jewel in its forehead, and the meaning of moments passes like the breeze that scarcely ruffles the leaf of the willow.

good lord

mac competed at wartburg over the weekend. the meet was split into 4k and 8k races. in the 8k the top four carleton runners were in before bo rydze. carleton is solid. i would say the favorite to win conference unless the olies have a good peak.

nebraska 10 - texas tech 70
worst loss in the history of history

vikings 34 - texans 28
it deserves repeating: the vikings have the worst pass defense in the nfl.

the twins lost their series with the yankees 1-3.

kerry got his ass kicked in the friday night debate. he lost all the ground he gained in the previous debate, especially on iraq and terrorism. bush cogently repeated his impregnable stance and successfully proved kerry to be a flip-flopper.

aaron, you have a hard time believing anyone can support bush. anyone except the christian middle to right and people who like tax cuts. how can a majority of americans not support bush.

let me tell you why i will vote for bush.
1. i feel safer with bush
2. bush puts money in my pockets
3. i share the same values as bush

in retaliation for 9/11 bush attacked the taliban in afghanistan. 75% of al-qaeda has been captured. afghanistan recently held elections. saddam hussein, a man with a hostile history, exhibited the desire to develop weapons of mass destruction, and it is possible that those weapons could have ended up in al-qaeda’s hands. it is best to attack the enemy when they are weak. so we attacked iraq and captured saddam hussein. the world is safer without saddam hussein, is it not.

bush's tax cuts put money in my pocket. i wasn't angry. i didn't donate my tax cut to charity. plus, tax cuts help stimulate the economy. the shitty economy is clinton's fault and september 11th hurt the economy too. but the economy is rebounding thanks to tax cuts.

bush supports my christian values. tell me how abortion is not murder, seriously. and do i need to remind everybody that gays are bad.

so far, the case for bush is strong.

cheney-edwards debate

viernes gigante

here are three lengthy articles from the boston globe.

Back-room dealing a Capitol trend

Energy bill a special-interests triumph

Medicare bill a study in D.C. spoils system

here are sebastian's grad school classes:
Accounting and Financial Analysis
Global Economic Environment
Finance Theory
Quantitative Techniques

everyone in graduate school should email me with a list of their classes or a synopsis of projects they are working on. i would like to know. perhaps the request deserves a personal email, we'll see.

if you don't want bush to be elected, go online at about 9:30 central time tonight and place your vote on fox, abc, cbs, nbc, and cnn affirming kerry's debate victory.

i apologize to all the conservatives and extremists (liberals) who have been sending me hate mail for writing with such narrow perspective. i now have a new gmail account, courtesy of sebastian.

my pre-debate interview with bush

president bush, do you believe senator kerry demonstrated he can take firm positions in the war on terror.

"Last week in our debate, he once again came down firmly on every side of the Iraq war," Mr. Bush said. "He stated that Saddam Hussein was a threat and that America had no business removing that threat. Senator Kerry said our soldiers and marines are not fighting for a mistake - but also called the liberation of Iraq a 'colossal error.' He said we need to do more to train Iraqis, but he also said we shouldn't be spending so much money over there. He said he wants to hold a summit meeting, so he can invite other countries to join what he calls 'the wrong war in the wrong place at the wrong time.'"

mr. president, do you believe senator kerry's statement that mexico is a country and is located on our southern border.

"of course mr. kerry would make a statement like that. cheney tells me kerry is vacillating, and that's disgusting. i personally think he's sitting on the fence, i mean, straddling the nuance. i've told the american people again and again that mexico is a country. but let me tell you something, they are not located on our southern border. if you listen to mr. kerry taking both sides, it just doesn't make sense. how can he lead when he doesn't make any sense."

mr. president, the second presidential debate shall be held as a town meeting in which citizens will pose domestic policy questions to the candidates. how do intend to respond after you disappointing first debate.

"you know, i've heard some people with their slogans say 'lick bush.' well, i'm gonna lick kerry tomorrow night. My opponent is a tax-and-spend liberal; I'm a compassionate conservative. My opponent wants to empower government; I want to use government to empower people. My opponent seems to think all the wisdom is found in Washington, D.C.; I trust the wisdom of the American people."

mr. president, please take a moment to discuss the central issues of domestic policy: health care, education, and environmental protection. we will not address tax cuts because tax cuts are good for every individual and the only way for a robust economy.

[HEALTH CARE]

"ben, I believe all Americans should have access to affordable, quality health care. I am working to address the root causes of rising health care costs, rather than shifting the costs to taxpayers or forcing Americans into an inflexible, one-size-fits-all bureaucratic system. my plan reduces the rising cost of health care; provides affordable coverage to those who need it most - low-income children and families, small businesses, the self-employed, and people who do not get health benefits through their job; and improves health care information, quality, and safety.

let me briefly list my accomplishments:

I established new, tax-free Health Savings Accounts (HSA) which allow Americans to own and control their own health care.

I have opened or expanded community and rural health centers with the goal of serving an additional 6.1 million people who live in underserved and rural areas.

I granted waivers and flexibility to states to extend eligibility under Medicaid and the State Children's Health Insurance Program (SCHIP) to an estimated 2.6 million low-income Americans.

I implemented a new rule to lower drug costs for millions of Americans by strengthening competition between generic and brand-name drugs, saving American consumers more than $35 billion in drug costs over the next ten years.

And, I created a Medicare Prescription Drug Benefit to help seniors pay for their medicines.

I will also support the death penalty for trial lawyers chasing frivolous lawsuits in an effort to sink the entire american economy.

[EDUCATION]

as for education, it is the key to opportunity and America's best tool in an increasingly competitive global economy. This means that every child deserves a world-class education and every worker deserves the support of a Government that makes a lifetime of learning a top priority.

The No Child Left Behind Act demands accountability in exchange for the record levels of Federal spending now going to K-12 public education, an increase of 49 percent since 2001. These reforms are already beginning to show strong results, but I want to take the next steps to ensure that all high school students are better prepared to enter higher education or the workforce.

again, let me list my current accomplishments and goals for my second term.

I have and will reform america's High Schools by providing $250 million annually to extend state assessment of student reading and math skills.

I will continue my efforts to improve early childhood education through the Healthy Start, Grow Smart program, including his proposal to strengthen Head Start.

I have and will Strengthen Head Start by focusing Head Start more clearly on school readiness, and allow states to integrate Head Start programs into their existing pre-school preparedness efforts in order to make better use of combined Federal and state resources. I will give priority consideration for funding to states that have a coordinated early childhood plan involving Head Start, pre-K, and child care services.

I Promote Literacy by training parents in early literacy through Head Start.

I have and will Continue to Fund Research to development of the most effective curricula and programs for teaching children early literacy and math skills; establish developmentally appropriate measurements; and identify effective adult and family literacy programs.

I have and will Expand the Reach Out and Read Program, which seeks to make early literacy a standard part of pediatric primary care.

I have and will Expand Healthy Start, Grow Smart by continuing and expanding the distribution of Healthy Start, Grow Smart booklets to provide parents the information they need to enhance their children's early development.

I have and will engage Faith and Community-Based Organizations to help provide parents with the skills they need to advance their children's healthy development.

And lastly, I have and will increase Minority Outreach to minority families to better disseminate effective early childhood development strategies.

[ENVIRONMENT]

ben, I think my environmental record speaks for itself. Over the last four years, the air has become cleaner, our water more pure, and we have reversed the net loss of wetlands. In addition, our parks are better managed, better funded, and better protected. I have launched a series of climate change initiatives to improve scientific understanding and reduce emissions through the use of new, energy-efficient technologies. I have proposed several clean air initiatives that will dramatically improve air quality and public health.

In my first term I made a comprehensive, long-term energy policy a top priority. my goal was clear and far-sighted: to promote affordable, reliable, and secure energy supplies by increasing conservation, investing in new technologies, and exploring for new domestic sources of energy. That plan included over 100 specific recommendations - nearly half of which addressed conservation, renewable energy, and energy efficiency.

I will work to secure passage of the Clear Skies Initiative to reduce power plant emissions of sulfur dioxide, nitrogen oxides, and mercury by 70 percent and help the states meet tougher new air quality standards.

I will complete the Clean Air Interstate Rule, which will require the steepest emissions cuts in over a decade.

I was the first President to propose caps on emissions of mercury and he will finalize the rule that will cut mercury emissions from power plants by 70 percent. This rule will improve public health and protect children and pregnant women.

For Farm Bill Conservation Programs, I will aggressively implement programs that will dedicate a record $40 billion over a decade to restore millions of acres of wetlands, protect habitats, conserve water, and improve streams and rivers near working farms and ranches. This commitment will include early re-enrollment and contract extensions for the Conservation Reserve Program and expansion of quail and wetlands habitat.

To Initiate Environmentally Safe Exploration, I will seek to promote environmentally sound domestic oil production in just one percent of Arctic National Wildlife Refuge, which could provide up to 1 million barrels of oil a day for nearly 20 years.

To Ensure Greater Electricity Reliability, I will work to modernize our electricity grid, establish mandatory reliability standards, and encourage new transmission investment, in order to help prevent a repeat of last year's blackout that affected 50 million people.

To Encourage Use of Efficient Technologies, I will provide incentives for deployment of efficient technologies for storage and transmission of energy, further contributing to the reliability of our electric grid.

To Promote Conservation and Support Energy Technologies I plan to provide $4 billion in tax incentives to spur the use of energy technologies.”

[GOD]

wow, president bush. i’m impressed with your knowledge and frankly surprised by the extensive and positive impact of your administration. just one last question, what do you have to say to people who think you are a flamer.

“people want a president of strong religious faith with oblivious conviction. I am that man. god bless america.”

keep on rocking in the free world

last night marye and i went to the vote for change concert at the xcel energy center in st. paul. bright eyes, REM, bruce springsteen and the e street band, john fogerty, and neil young performed. REM was good. people love the boss. max weinberg is awesome. neil young is a crazy, crazy old man.

twins 2 - yankees 0

you are probably as good as gay

nebraska 14 - kansas 8

i was watching halftime of the gophers football game saturday night waiting patiently for a glimpse of the nebraska score when norm coleman* tried to unctuously banter with me. norm oozed "i knew someone who played for alabama under bear bryant." then he proceeded with insolence "alabama beat nebraska by forty points in the orange bowl." serenity now. nebraska has never lost by forty points. apparently norm was trying to recall the 1967 sugar bowl in which alabama beat nebraska 34-7, a 27 point margin in my estimation. admittedly, that is a rather humiliating defeat. but not quite as humiliating as the 1972 orange bowl in which nebraska throttled alabama 38-6 in a battle of #1 vs. #2.

*it wasn’t really norm coleman, it was somebody else

Felony Convictions Disenfranchise Many Voters

voter-disenfranchisement laws may be disproportionately affecting black men, many of whom have felony drug convictions that prevent them from voting. drug arrests are inherently discretionary. previous research has found that blacks do not use drugs more than whites. however, blacks are arrested more often on drug charges, and are convicted more often.

John Graham heads an obscure agency in the White House called the Office of Information and Regulatory Affairs (OIRA), which reviews draft regulations submitted by agencies such as the Environmental Protection Agency and U.S. Forest Service and directs agencies to consider alternatives and analyze both benefits and costs of regulation. With Bush facing stiff opposition in Congress to his energy and environmental legislation, the White House turned to rule-making to push much of its agenda.

on a side note, i support drilling for oil all over alaska, especially in wilderness areas. do you think i give a shit about caribou, tundra, and marmots that i will never see. no, i don't. people always bitch about protecting the environment. why do you want to protect the environment.

tuesday's truism: homosexuality bad because god says so.

i spoke with god last night and gained some real insight.

god, a lot of people reading my blog want to know why homosexuality is bad.

"i hates gays."

god, hate is a pretty strong word.

"yes, it is true. actually i hate the sin, not the sinner."

god, what exactly is the sin of homosexuality. is it the love, public display of affection, pure carnal bareback action, holding hands, tongues in low places, a furtive affectionate glance across the room.

"obviously ben, gay sex bothers me the most. in fact, it angers me. the wrath builds up inside. i want to smite. i am also against pda. it makes me uncomfortable."

god, i am loath to ask this next question because i know we have seen your unswerving logic in physics revealed to us in wonderful dynamics like the conservation of angular momentum, but what is your logic behind your dislike of gay cunnilingus, fellatio, and anal sex.

“all those acts of sexual abomination deny creation, life, my most precious gift. sex is the unity of man and woman to bestow the gift of life by creating a child in my image.”

does it follow that if people are having sex without the goal of fertilizing the egg with a sperm, then they are as good as gay.

tcm

so marye and i watched twin cities marathon yesterday. we biked over to nokomis to await the runners' arrival just after mile eleven. 1-2 were out at course record pace and had a huge lead on 3-4, who in turn had a decent lead on the enormous pursuit peloton. after the runners floated by us, they did a lap around lake nokomis and we caught them again just as they turned onto minnehaha. we biked to the lake street bridge for our next vantage point. in the five or so miles from our last observance the proverbial shit had gone down. 1-2 had a diminished but solid lead over a new 3 and after that was a scattered, clumpy following. things were getting stretched out. the relatively muscle-bound 3 was on fire. he passed 1-2 around mile 23. rumor has it that he said something like "later bitches" when he passed the two frontrunners, demoralizing them with aplomb that forced 2-3 to drop out of the race, literally. i haven't looked at official results, but liz, andrea, and amanda had good races.

finally, official results from bolder dash 10k

1 M20 Chris Rogers, 26, Minneapolis, MN 34:26 5:32
2 M40 Kirt Goetzke, 43, Plymouth, MN 35:02 5:38
3 M20 Benjamin Knudson, 25, Minneapolis, MN 35:14 5:40
4 M20 Troy Stresemann, 28, Minnetonka, MN 35:31 5:43

i think it's worth pointing out that i saw chris rogers running a shitty marathon time yesterday.

the mac pack ran at the pre-nationals meet on white tail golf course in colfax, wisconsin.

the women handily beat stolaf and st. thomas. will they win the miac. if not this year, maybe next season when the entire top seven returns.

the mac men ran fast. stolaf ran faster.

1. St. Olaf
4 Malcolm Richards, Sr 25:51.4
6 Kelly Fulton, Sr 25:58.6
17 Sam Hauck, Jr 26:12.6
28 Marc Ellingson, Jr 26:30.6
30 Tony Hoff, So 26:32.4
45 Jason Havey, Jr 26:58.1
59 Mat Keller, Fr 27:13.7
Time = 2:11:05.4 Places = 85

5. Macalester
10 Bo Rydze, Sr 26:03.1
20 Roscoe Sopiwnik, Jr 26:23.7
23 Dylan Keith, So 26:25.6
36 Eric Olson, Sr 26:39.2
69 Jordan Selbo, Jr 27:25.1
70 Matt Wegmann, Fr 27:25.1
75 Nate Crider, Fr 27:27.1
Time = 2:12:56.5 Places = 158

rumor has it that jordan selbo ran with his hulk fists on.

mac was right behind nebraska wesleyan, ahead of st. thomas and st. john's, also ahead of gustavus adulterous, augsburg, concordia-moorhead, and bethel, which was named after a chapel for seamen (a bethel runner finished fifth, the second bethel finisher claimed 110th). saint mary's was way down toward the bottom.

other performances from the day
94 Tom Hammer, So 27:39.6 Macalester
98 Tim Stendahl, Sr 27:42.9 Macalester

from the blue race, a hotly contested, rancorous rivalry continued.
57 Martins Blums, Sr 29:34.5 Macalester
62 Paul Singh, Sr 29:45.9 Macalester

they both beat jeff doll (67 So 29:55.4 Saint John's), younger brother of disreputable chris doll, who's infamy extends from such acts as spraining his foot mid-season while trying to win a bet (which he did) by sticking his foot in his ass, and a police chase in pursuit of mr. doll in st. peter when he got lost while streaking the gustavus all-miac party--a chase which allegedly included mr. doll scaling fences, shaking off a brutal clotheslining, eluding police, knocking on some poor soul's door to ask for directions back to the party, and eventually rejoining the fracas only to pass out naked on an ottoman. true story. in the man’s own words, "i'm chris mother-fuckin doll. once you meet me you'll never forget me."

congrats tim

ladies and gents, i have the honor of announcing on this site that tim pavlish is the new owner of a beautiful house built in 1887 on the west side.

here's the address:
624 ohio street, st. paul, minnesota 55107
where it @

those of you who are erstwhile cross country runners will recognize the location, southeast across the river on smith, aka high bridge, four blocks from cherokee park. great proximity to the old man river cafe and newly resurfaced tennis courts. if tim doesn't have enough money to pay for food after he pays the mortgage, he can always head down to the river and catch a fatty muskrat.

tim is looking for renters for his duplex. that's right, it's a duplex folks. the upstairs has two bedrooms and the spacious downstairs has one bedroom. the availability of rental space depends on which level tim decides to occupy. tim is open to all renters, heterosexual, gay, lesbian, bi, transgender, box turtle, etc.

*

who watched the debate last night. i thought it would leave me writhing painfully on the floor, but instead i was almost inspired to strut around the room doing the double fist pump. that's right, kerry kicked ass. not that it matters, because as ben said back in 2002, the passion of the bush will be re-elected. still, the debate is now my happy place.

eat

two things: 1. article from the asian times and 2. proposed questions for the presidential candidates from the nytimes
1.
Bush's UN speech, de-mythologizedBy Stephen Zunes
(Posted with permission from Foreign Policy in Focus)
Commentators in the mainstream US media seem genuinely perplexed over the polite but notably unenthusiastic reception given to President George W Bush's September 21 address before the United Nations General Assembly. Why wasn't a speech that emphasized such high ideals as democracy, the rule of law, and the threat of terrorism better received?
The answer may be found through a critical examination of the assumptions underlying the idealistic rhetoric of the US president's message. Below are a number of examples:
"We know that dictators are quick to choose aggression, while free nations strive to resolve differences in peace. We know that oppressive governments support terror, while free governments fight the terrorists in their midst."
Notwithstanding the clear moral preference of democracy over dictatorship, this formula fails to withstand closer scrutiny. There are many dictators in the past and present - as nasty as they may have been toward their own people - who have not engaged in acts of aggression against other nations and have not supported terrorists. Furthermore, the United States - one of the world's oldest democracies - has demonstrated through its invasion of Iraq, as well as its earlier invasions of Panama, Grenada and other countries, that it can certainly be "quick to choose aggression". Similarly, the decision by the Bush administration a few weeks ago to allow into the country a group of right-wing Cuban exiles who had been implicated in a series of attacks against civilian targets - including an attempt to set off a series of explosions in a crowded auditorium at a Panamanian university in 1998, and the blowing up of an airliner in Barbados in 1976 - as well as the active US support for the Contra terrorists who attacked civilian targets in Nicaragua during the 1980s - demonstrate that democracies do indeed allow "terrorists in their midst".
"We're determined to prevent proliferation, and to enforce the demands of the world [demanding that nations] fully comply with all Security Council resolutions."
In reality, US policy is not nearly as categorical as this statement implies. For example, since 1998, India and Pakistan have been in violation of UN Security Council Resolution 1172, which calls on these governments to cease their development of nuclear weapons and ballistic missiles. Since 1981, Israel has stood in violation of UN Security Council Resolution 487, which calls on that country's government to place its nuclear facilities under the trusteeship of the International Atomic Energy Agency. The US has repeatedly blocked the United Nations from enforcing those resolutions, even as it insisted that Iraqi non-compliance with similar resolutions required that the UN authorize an invasion of that country and the overthrow of its government. It appears that the Bush administration, like preceding Republican and Democratic administrations, is only concerned with UN resolutions regarding non-proliferation if the target of the resolution is a government they don't like. Such double standards make a mockery of law-based efforts toward non-proliferation, however, and will likely encourage, rather than discourage, regimes to develop weapons of mass destruction (WMD).
"The Russian children [in Beslan] did nothing to deserve such awful suffering, and fright, and death. The people of Madrid and Jerusalem and Istanbul and Baghdad have done nothing to deserve sudden and random murder. These acts violate the standards of justice in all cultures, and the principles of all religions. All civilized nations are in this struggle together, and all must fight the murderers."
All true. Yet the numbers of innocent civilians killed in recent years by US forces in Afghanistan and Iraq as well as by US-armed Israeli forces in the West Bank and Gaza Strip and by US-armed Turkish forces in Kurdistan have far surpassed those killed by all Middle Eastern terrorist groups combined. While a case can certainly be made that the killings of civilians by the US and its allies was, in most cases, not as wanton as the killings in these terrorist attacks, the callous disregard for civilian lives in many of these military operations did constitute clear violations of international humanitarian law.
"The dictator [Saddam Hussein] agreed in 1991, as a condition of a ceasefire, to fully comply with all Security Council resolutions - then ignored more than a decade of those resolutions. Finally, the Security Council promised serious consequences for his defiance. And the commitments we make must have meaning. When we say 'serious consequences', for the sake of peace, there must be serious consequences. And so a coalition of nations enforced the just demands of the world."
First of all, the majority of member states that voted in favor of UN Security Council Resolution 1441 - which warned of "serious consequences" for continued Iraqi non-compliance - explicitly stated that this was not an authorization for the use of force and that a subsequent resolution would be needed. The two times in its history that the UN Security Council has authorized the use of military force to enforce its resolution - in response to the North Korean invasion of South Korea in 1950 and to the Iraqi invasion of Kuwait in 1990 - such authorization was quite explicit.
Second, if one were to accept Bush's interpretation of "serious consequences" as simply another term for a foreign invasion of a sovereign nation, it is downright Orwellian to claim that such "serious consequences" must be inflicted "for the sake of peace".
Finally, at the time the US launched its invasion of Iraq, the Iraqi government had allowed United Nations inspectors back in with unfettered access to wherever they wanted to go whenever they wanted to, and they were in the process of confirming the fact that Iraq had indeed dismantled, destroyed, or otherwise rendered inoperable its proscribed weapons, delivery systems, and WMD programs. Therefore, the US-led invasion did not "enforce the just demands of the world" since the demands were already being enforced without the use of military force.
"More than 10 million Afghan citizens - over 4 million of them women - are now registered to vote in next month's presidential election. To any who still would question whether Muslim societies can be democratic societies, the Afghan people are giving their answer."
Currently in Afghanistan, vote-buying, intimidation and the enormously disproportionate resources allocated to pro-government candidates raise serious questions as to how democratic these upcoming elections will be. Currently, there are more Afghan males registered to vote than there are eligible Afghan male voters; duplicate voting cards are commonplace and can be sold on the open market. The regime, which lacks solid control of much of the country outside the capital Kabul, was largely hand-picked by the US. The ongoing violence and chaos in the country, along with extremely high rates of illiteracy, raise serious questions as to whether the Western-style election the US is trying to set up will have any credibility among the Afghans themselves.
No one should question whether Muslim societies can be democratic societies (on the very day of Bush's speech, the world's most populous Muslim country, Indonesia, was holding a peaceful presidential runoff election - a fact he did not mention). However, Afghanistan under US domination, is no more a model of a democratic society than Afghanistan under Soviet domination 20 years ago was a model of a socialist society.
"A democratic Iraq has ruthless enemies, because terrorists know the stakes in that country. They know that a free Iraq in the heart of the Middle East will be a decisive blow against their ambitions for that region."
This assumes that the armed resistance in Iraq is not because a Western power invaded and occupied their country, failed to provide basic services and security, sold off key sectors of their economy to foreigners, and installed a puppet regime, but simply because its members don't want democracy. It also fails to explain why when other Middle Eastern states have taken even further steps toward democracy than Iraq, there has not been this kind of terror. Indeed, the opposite is true: For example, there was virtually no terrorism when Algeria democratized its political system in the late 1980s, but then saw an enormous rise in terrorism after a military coup short-circuited its democratic experiment at the end of 1991.
"Coalition forces now serving in Iraq are confronting the terrorists and foreign fighters so peaceful nations around the world will never have to face them within our own borders."
First of all, well over 90% of the fighting is by US forces, hardly a "coalition".
Second, there are indeed terrorists among the dozen or more opposition groups in Iraq, but the majority of the armed opposition has been targeting US occupation forces, not civilians, and therefore should not be considered terrorists. Similarly, there are foreign fighters among them, but most credible sources put the percentage of foreigners in the various resistance groups - terrorist and otherwise - at well under 5%.
Third, this idea that if the US withdrew, these terrorists would suddenly leave Iraq and start attacking the US and other countries is specious. This is simply a retread of the rationalization used during the Vietnam War that "if we don't fight them over there, we'll have to fight them here". Despite the US withdrawal and the communist victory nearly 30 years ago, the Vietnamese have yet to attack the US. The Vietnamese stopped killing Americans when American forces got out of Vietnam. One can similarly assume that the Iraqis will stop killing Americans when American forces get out of Iraq.
"For too long, many nations, including my own, tolerated, even excused, oppression in the Middle East in the name of stability. Oppression became common, but stability never arrived. We must take a different approach. We must help the reformers of the Middle East as they work for freedom, and strive to build a community of peaceful, democratic nations."
These are noble words, but the reality of US policy is very different: Under the Bush administration, US military aid, police training, and financial assistance to Middle Eastern governments that engage in patterns of gross and systematic human-rights violations has dramatically increased. Since the Bush administration came to office, thousands of reformers have been jailed, tortured, and murdered by governments supported by the United States.
"This commitment to democratic reform is essential to resolving the Arab-Israeli conflict. Peace will not be achieved by Palestinian rulers who intimidate opposition, tolerate corruption, and maintain ties to terrorist groups. The long-suffering Palestinian people deserve better. They deserve true leaders capable of creating and governing a free and peaceful Palestinian state."
This statement assumes that if Palestinian President Yasser Arafat and the Palestinian Authority cleaned up their act, Israel would allow the creation of a viable Palestinian state, which is the key requisite for peace. In reality, the right-wing Israeli government of Prime Minister Ariel Sharon, with the support of the United States, has embarked upon a plan to annex nearly half of the occupied territories and divide up the remainder into small, non-contiguous cantons surrounded by Israel, where the Israelis would control the borders, the airspace, the ports and the water resources. This will clearly make the establishment of a viable Palestinian state impossible, whatever the nature of the Palestinian leadership. Israel - again, with US support - has also rejected consideration of withdrawal from occupied Syrian territory, despite promises by the Damascus government of strict security guarantees.
It is important to remember that Kuwait's rulers during the early 1990s also intimidated opposition, tolerated corruption, and maintained ties to terrorist groups. That did not stop the United States, along with the rest of the international community, from demanding that Iraq end its occupation of that country. There are no such US demands, however, that Israel end its occupation.
Stephen Zunes is professor of politics and chair of the peace and justice studies program at the University of San Francisco. He serves as Middle East editor for the Foreign Policy in Focus project and is the author of Tinderbox: US Middle East Policy and the Roots of Terrorism (Common Courage Press, 2003)
2.
* questions for kerry
If President Bush next week were to announce an offensive against Falluja and other terrorist strongholds in the Sunni triangle, would you support it?
•
You have said that we cannot cut and run from Iraq and that we could "realistically aim to bring all our troops home within the next four years." But if you now consider the war to have been a mistake, how could you, as president, "ask a man to be the last man to die for a mistake''?
•
You've said that it is unacceptable to allow a second African genocide in a decade, this time in Sudan. You've also said you don't propose sending American troops to Sudan. If it becomes clear that the only way to stop the killing is through armed intervention by a coalition of the willing, led by United States troops but lacking the sanction of the United Nations Security Council, would you as president take such an action?
*
The new International Criminal Court has gained the support of many European nations. In a recent statement to the American Bar Association, you asserted that the Bush administration has been "ham-handed" in its approach to the court and has "needlessly alienated" allies on the issue. But you don't say much else - merely that you would "carefully consider the full range of U.S. interests at stake with respect to the court as we review our policy and fashion a more constructive approach."
Do you intend to ask the Senate to ratify the treaty and join the court? How would you ensure that the court respects good-faith differences in war-fighting doctrine? How, in the meantime, would you prevent the court from asserting criminal jurisdiction, without American consent, over members of the United States military deployed abroad?
•
After the 1998 bombings of American Embassies in East Africa, President Bill Clinton ordered missile strikes against Osama bin Laden's training camps in Afghanistan. Should we have responded more vigorously then, and to the bombing of the Navy destroyer Cole in 2000? Was there any additional military option before 9/11 that would have made sense?
•
The former head of Saddam Hussein's nuclear centrifuge program, Mahdi Obeidi, says that Iraq's nuclear program "could have been reinstituted at the snap of Saddam Hussein's fingers." Now in the United States, Mr. Obeidi says that Mr. Hussein continued to back a long-range missile project and harbored "the illusion in his mind that he had a nuclear program," constrained only by economic sanctions.
But economic sanctions against Iraq would almost certainly have been lifted by the United Nations once arms inspections were completed. How then could we have guarded against Mr. Hussein's reckless intentions? If you were president, would you have judged regime change a bad policy, assuming that legal requirements were met?
*
might you explain the apparent abrupt change in policy of Libya; the unexpected removal of Abdul Qadeer Khan, the father of Pakistan's atomic bomb; and the about-face in Saudi Arabia - and what precise plans do you have to induce similar such positive changes in attitude in Iran, Lebanon and Syria?
•
In January, you promised to be a president who "reduces the overall need for deployment of American forces in the globe - and I mean North Korea, Germany and the rest of the world." More recently, however, you have chastised President Bush for saying that he will do precisely that, suggesting that his "hastily announced plan raises more doubts about our intentions and our commitments than it provides real answers." As president, would you send those departing American troops back into Germany and on the Korean Peninsula to restore previous levels? And if not, why?
•
President Bush was the first American president to isolate Yasir Arafat. Do you agree with the president's radical step of ostracizing Mr. Arafat? If so, would you also ensure that he is no longer a party to the Middle East peace negotiations?
* questions for bush
You say that we are winning in Iraq. Senator Chuck Hagel, a Republican, says, "We're in deep trouble." Gen. John P. Abizaid is asking for more troops. Secretary of State Colin Powell admits the insurgency is getting worse. The C.I.A. is pessimistic. Billions of dollars that were earmarked for reconstruction have been diverted for security. Insurgent attacks have quadrupled. Deaths of coalition troops are up. Significant chunks of Iraq are under enemy control. You have no viable military plan to make sure the January elections proceed peacefully and no political plan to reconcile competing factions. Your argument for re-election is that this is too dangerous a time to change direction. But since the direction is obviously wrong, don't we at least need to change drivers?
•
How has the Iraq war made us safer, if it transformed Iraq from a place whose military was surrounded and contained, into what you have repeatedly called the "central front" in the war on terror?
•
Your exit strategy for Iraq begins with successful elections in January. And yet there are many obstacles to those elections, especially in areas where the insurgents hold power. Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld says it doesn't matter if the people in certain regions are unable to vote. Secretary Powell says elections will not be credible unless all Iraqis take part. Do you agree with Secretary Rumsfeld that partial elections are acceptable, or with Secretary Powell that the elections must be nationwide?
•
You have proclaimed that "freedom is on the march" around the globe, but freedom in Russia is in rapid retreat. During the 2000 campaign, you blasted President Vladimir Putin of Russia for "killing children" in Chechnya. Mr. Putin has now been fighting terrorism for years and failing dismally. What lessons do you draw from Russia's experience when considering our own options for fighting terror?
•
Compared with when you took office, are we more safe or less safe on the Korean Peninsula? What concrete progress have you made during the past in preventing North Korea from building nuclear weapons?
*
There are reports coming out of Iraq that your administration plans to conduct military crackdowns on insurgent areas after the election in the United States, to regain control before the Iraqi elections in January. Is that your plan, and do you think that attacking Iraqi cities, as we have done in Falluja and Najaf, is in the long-term interest of the United States?
•
Iran is building up its nuclear capabilities and has had a hand in terrorist attacks on Americans. Iran is harboring leaders of Al Qaeda and has effectively suppressed democratic forces. Under what circumstances would you authorize military action, including an invasion, to achieve regime change in Iran?
•
On March 11, bombs went off in commuter trains in Madrid, killing 200 people. How hard do you think it would be for such an attack to be mounted in the United States? What steps have been taken to improve security on trains in this country and what more needs to be done in general to defend America against attacks?
*
Do you really believe that there are fewer terrorists plotting against America today than there were before you began the invasion of Iraq?
•
Your version of Christianity supports and blesses preventive war. What relation is this to the Christianity preached by the pope and by mainstream Protestants who oppose preventive war?
•
Since you obviously did not anticipate the troubles in Iraq, what do you plan to do to the incompetent advisers who misled you and are responsible for the deaths of more than 1,000 American G.I.'s and 20,000 Iraqi civilians? Or do you not see an accountability problem? President John F. Kennedy fired the people who led him into the Bay of Pigs. Why do you not do likewise?

pimps up

klinker and paul, it's always good to hear your insight.

to klinker:

was eli whitney a black man. did my teacher lie to me.

klinker, you seem to suggest that ethnic cultural categories are mutually exclusive. therefore, christianity is not a part of ethnic culture. or maybe it is if we consider ethnic modifications of christianity.

it has elsewhere been suggested that whoever invents something has ownership of the proceeding culture. people will argue that x isn’t white culture because they didn’t create it. i’m sure people can think of many things that white culture commandeered or co-opted. on the converse, white's invented basketball. do whites own it forever. do middle easterners own christianity. that seems ridiculous.

i wasn’t creating a taxonomy in my list of white culture, but if i did, i imagine the nomenclature would be similar to that of dogs. i was listing things that i identify as my culture. i guess that means i was claiming that my culture is white culture. i don’t know what i think about that claim.

affiliating white culture with privilege is not too generic for my point. white privilege might be the only variable that unites all whites in commonality and therefore, what can define white culture with a greater degree of accuracy. reductio ad absurdum.

i would say power sits as king of the mountain.
poor men oppress women.

*

to paul:

does invention equal cultural ownership. whites invented basketball. blacks have made significant contributions to the game and have elevated the game to its current state. who’s culture is it. did whites' patent on basketball run out. can culture not be reproduced, transmitted, or distributed without the prior written consent of the cultural owner. how do we decide cultural ownership. through culture battles. whoever is better at the culture owns it.

i am white and i have my own culture. how are these two reconciled. i really don’t give a shit. i don't feel any need or longing for white culture. yet, when someone says there is no such thing as white culture, i feel compelled to remonstrate. i don't know why. maybe i feel that denying the existence of white culture obfuscates the complexity and evolution of white culture. “there is no white culture” has negative undertones. it hints that white people don't have culture. look at all those desultory white people living manque lives. poor jude. (just kidding jude. i figure if i occasionally throw a jab, you might put down that stats book and comment)

*
in other news. login, inc. is relocating to oakdale. that sucks for me. i had a nice seven mile bike ride to work and easy bus access for the days i didn't bike. are the days of our one-car household over. can i continue to take the bus with shitty reverse commute schedules to and from suburbia.

*

and just to let everyone know, if i call you a bitch while i am arguing vociferously against you and your cockamamie ideas, i’m just practicing my ad hominem skills in honor of the presidential campaign.

have you ever been circumcised

i posted this on jude's site.

there is no such thing as white culture?! that’s bullshit. talk about a fucking pigeonhole. white culture is:

farming corn and soybeans, raising livestock, milking dairy cows. it is football, basketball, and baseball. it is band, orchestra, and choir. it is christianity. it is meat, potatoes, and a vegetable. it is casseroles and potlucks. it is demure behavior. it is hunting pheasants, deer, and ducks. it is rock and roll, country, and folk music. it is innovation and enterprise. it is FM radio, transistors, air conditioners, the airplane, vulcanized rubber, the light bulb, the telegraph, the sewing machine, the cotton gin, vaccinations making life better.

rebuttals
a. these are not uniquely white
b. others were denied the opportunity for such creation

then how exclusive is culture. how do you define culture. how do you assign cultural ownership of something. do people claim culture or does culture claim people.

sometimes it seems the only culture accorded to whites is the culture of oppression. this oppressive, colonial, imperial, racist past of whiteness has prevented or nullified any possible claims of white culture. the one most exclusive commonality of whites was the advantage of white skin. there was an affinity in whiteness. welcome racists to my hotel, my restaurant, my restroom, my drinking fountain.

what happens when a part 1 of a culture A is adopted by culture B.
is part 1 no longer part of culture A.
and if culture A + culture B = culture C
then is part 1 only a part of culture C.

*

tuesday's truism

heterosexual marriages (as opposed to homosexual marriages) are valid because they produce children. infertile couples and old people should not be allowed to be legally married. if you are married and neither infertile nor beyond your ability to produce children, but yet you don’t have children, you will be blamed for underpopulation.

*

i forgot to mention that the worst best team in the nfl beat the hapless bears on sunday. i watched the game at klinker's new apartment. we were sitting on the couch together and klinker picked up a large pocketknife from the table and asked me if i had ever been circumcised. don't worry, i'm unscathed.

bolder trot

running
week total - 65
monday nearly killed me. i wanted to do a long run and i decided i would run out to lake harriet and back along minnehaha parkway. i didn't take into consideration how far this route would be. well, it was eighteen.
on saturday i ran the bolder dash 10k.

i couldn’t find official results, so here are my estimations
1. some runner from gear 34:35
2. kirt goetzke 35:07
3. me 35:15

splits
5:33, 5:36, 5:34, 5:44, 5:47, 5:37, 1:20
i realized that i was going too fast for comfort at the 5k, so i slowed down. the gear guy and kirt pulled away. the gear guy pulled away from kirt. kirt really sucks at running hills. so i made up a little ground at the end of the race. after the race i asked kirt if he was running twin cities marathon next sunday. of course he is, but he had some racing to do in the meantime. the bolder dash 5k coming up in half an hour and then a 10k-5k double the next day. after that, he could focus on twin cities. wow. i was happy with my race, but maybe a little disappointed i didn't choose to feel the big hurt. i went for a run yesterday and felt like i hadn't raced, so that's a good sign. i usually always have stressed calves the next day. i guess i didn't go fast enough.

all proceeds of the race went to bolder options, a non-profit organization that matches at-risk youth with adult mentors to run or bike together, as well as work on homework. good stuff.

carleton ran at the roy griak invitational at the university of minnesota on saturday. impressive results.

8. 252 Carleton (26:48, 2:14:00)
========================================
1 8 Dan Bucy 4 25:46
2 44 Steve Harris 3 26:49
3 50 Chris Lundberg 4 26:54
4 61 Adam Williamson 3 27:01
5 89 John Nowinski 1 27:30
6 (122) Quentin Kennedy 1 28:06
7 (136) Ruben Woodruff 2 28:21

*

what am i saying about this quote from bush: "my inclination was to support the government and the war until proven wrong, and that only came later, as i realized we could not explain the mission, had no exit strategy, and did not seem to be fighting to win." i am surprised bush arrived at those conclusions about vietnam. the mission was perfectly lucid, stop the spread of communism. i'm sure the exit strategy was to leave victorious. victory was to defeat the viet cong, establish a strong south vietnam as a bulwark against communism, station troops there, and go home. so, when bush said of vietnam, "we could not explain the mission," what exactly did he mean.

a. communism did not pose a significant threat
b. the costs of war outweighed the benefits
c. pacifist tie-dyed hippies whipped americans into a anti-war frenzy, forcing the military to abandon victory

what does it take to prove a war wrong.

was the mission in iraq clear. yes. were there justifications. yes. was i willing to die for those justifications. no, but i pray.

oil and middle east history link.

*

in other news

we are accepting resumes for the sales position at my work. apparently someone studied mid-evil history at the university of minnesota. nice.

estas muy religioso

i would like to call the attention of my hundreds of readers to the comment section.

*
in other news

this excerpt in bob herbert's nytimes editorial. in president george w. bush's autobiography, "A Charge to Keep: My Journey to the White House," he comments on his vietnam war stance. "My inclination was to support the government and the war until proven wrong, and that only came later, as I realized we could not explain the mission, had no exit strategy, and did not seem to be fighting to win." that's great.

has anyone been keeping an eye on hurricane jeanne. that bitch is crazy. she turned north and was headed harmlessly into the middle of the atlantic when all of a sudden jeanne remembered, i didn't hit florida, florida has never been hit by four hurricanes in one season, i'm going for the glory. and let's not forget about hurricane karl. that fucker just grazed iceland. kofi, don't feel too safe.

it is time that we realize that these are not ordinary hurricanes. set naivete aside, they are terrorist hurricanes, recruited after the u.s. invaded iraq.